The Courage of Change
Have you ever found yourself dreaming about a more fulfilling life but feeling stuck when it comes to making it happen? You’re not alone. Change is one of those things we all crave and resist at the same time. It can feel overwhelming, uncomfortable, and even a little scary. So, let’s unpack why that happens—and how you can move through it with courage and confidence.
Why Does Change Feel So Hard?
Here’s the thing: your brain loves to keep you safe. And by "safe," I mean comfortable—even if that comfort zone isn’t where you want to be.
Deep in your brain, there’s a part called the amygdala, which is responsible for detecting threats. It’s an amazing feature when you’re in real danger (think: dodging a speeding car), but it’s not so helpful when you’re simply trying to start something new. The amygdala doesn’t know the difference, so it can trigger feelings of anxiety or fear at the thought of change.
Then there’s your brain’s habit centre, the basal ganglia. This part loves routines because they require less energy. Even if your current routine isn’t working for you, your brain will fight to keep things as they are. It’s no wonder change feels like an uphill battle!
Courage Isn’t About Erasing Fear
Here’s a truth I often share with my clients: courage isn’t the absence of fear. It’s feeling the fear and taking a step forward anyway.
But to do that, your nervous system needs to feel safe and regulated. If your body is stuck in fight, flight, or freeze mode, no amount of willpower will get you to take action. This is where somatic practices—those simple, body-centred tools—can make all the difference.
Try This:
Pause and Breathe: When you’re feeling overwhelmed, stop for a moment. Take a deep inhale for four counts, hold it for two, and exhale for six. It’s like hitting a reset button for your nervous system.
Feel Your Feet: Yep, I mean that literally. Press your feet into the ground and notice the sensation. This grounding practice helps signal to your brain, “Hey, I’m safe.”
Move Your Body: Stuck energy often shows up as tension or heaviness. A short walk, a few stretches, or even shaking out your hands can help release it.
These small actions might not seem like much, but they’re powerful ways to create a sense of safety, which makes change feel a little less intimidating.
Your Body Knows Before Your Mind Does
One of the most fascinating things I’ve learned (and seen in my clients) is how much wisdom our bodies hold. That "stuck" feeling you get? It’s your body’s way of telling you something isn’t aligned. Maybe it’s tension in your shoulders, a heavy chest, or a knot in your stomach.
Learning to notice these sensations and tune into what they mean is a game-changer. Neuroscience backs this up—there’s even a term for it: interoception. It’s your brain’s ability to sense what’s happening inside your body. And the more you pay attention, the better you’ll get at understanding what you need.
Why the First Step Feels the Hardest
If the thought of taking action still feels overwhelming, you’re not failing—your brain is just doing its job. It craves predictability. Even if you know a change will be good for you, part of your brain is yelling, “No! Stay where it’s safe and familiar!”
But here’s the good news: your brain is also incredibly adaptable. With practice, you can rewire it through small, consistent actions. Start tiny—one phone call, one journal entry, one conversation. Each step builds confidence and sends a message to your brain that change isn’t so scary after all.
How I Help Women Navigate Change
When I work with clients, we start by creating a safe space to explore what’s really going on beneath the surface. We use tools like body scanning, breathwork, and mindful movement to quiet the mind and tap into the body’s wisdom.
One of my clients recently shared how powerful it felt to simply name the tension she’d been carrying in her chest. That small moment of awareness led to a huge shift in how she approached a difficult decision.
Somatic practices like these aren’t just about calming your nervous system; they’re about connecting with yourself on a deeper level. And when you feel connected, you feel empowered to take those first steps toward change.
The Truth About Courage
Let me be real with you: change isn’t easy, and it’s definitely not comfortable. But staying stuck can feel even harder. The courage to look honestly at your life—to admit what’s not working and dream about what could be better—is an act of self-love.
So here’s my invitation to you: start small. Give yourself permission to feel what you feel. Take one tiny, brave step toward the life you want. You don’t have to have it all figured out. You just need to start.